So I have been focusing recently on life and all the things I am involved in. I have been working on getting ready for our Holiday Party for Pisgah Area SORBA (http://www.pisgahareasorba.org/?p=4430) and also working on my stand up comedy and performed my fourth routine last Thursday. Otherwise I have been pretty low-key and thinking about life. First of all I have been having some foot pain and after going to the doctor found out my left foot has a strange lump on top. So I am waiting to see an expert to find out what it is and how to fix it. Being I stand and walk all day at work it is bothering me a fair amount so hopefully it gets figured out and fixed sooner than later. Stupid feet they have always been my body’s main pain source between this, plantar fasciitis and tendonitis. I am happy thought that my main complaints are not my back as I would rather deal with foot pain than back pain.
Also I have also been thinking about my overall health and have been feeling fat. I need to lose weight not just because I do but to feel better about myself. So in the past couple of weeks I have been eating less, drinking less (well at least less high alcohol local brew, as I write this with a Yuengling Light in hand) and working out more. Even using that gym membership I have. So hopefully this winter I at least don’t gain any weight. I know with holidays and visiting my parents it won’t be easy but if I can at least be conscious of what is going in my body it will help.
Lastly, I am feeling lonely. This is the longest I have gone without any relationship or dating and it’s kind of weird. In a way it’s good and in a way it is making me feel pretty damn lonely. I think differently about it every day and even within every hour. After being committed to one person so long being uncommitted for this long is making me feel a little unworthy. I do know deep down I will find someone at the right time but in the meantime I am starting to wish that was now. So I’m doing my best to keep these thoughts out of my head and keep myself occupied with everything else. Which is part of why I keep so busy.
So here I am taking a break from all the “catch-up” emails and such tonight and thought I would reflect a little bit. It’s fall, approaching winter which always has me a little down but I think overall I’m keeping my spirits up a little better than normal. I can’t wait until the days start to get longer again as these dark nights are rough on me.
So as a final thought I was listening to one of my Robert Hunter cds in my car on the way home from work and thought I would share a song I fell in love with about 17 years ago. Sorry no video but this is the version from my cd.